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I'm a straight girl and I've crossed paths with porn a couple of times. I've watched it occasionally but don't really feel like it's shaped my sexuality at all. However, I've had plenty of conversations and experiences - some odd, some hilarious, some just sad - that came about because of porn. Pretty much all of them have been with friends my own age I'm 19 and have centred around the lack of honest, ethical portrayal of female sexuality in porn. Quite a lot of my sexually active female friends have had sex with guys who got most or all of their sex ed from porn. One of them slept with a guy who attempted to go from vaginal sex to anal sex without any preparation, without any lube, and without asking or ever having talked about the possibility before. When his partner acted shocked and upset, he seemed amazed that it was 'such a big deal' because 'they do it all the time in porn and the girls like it'. While this story is the extreme, a lot of us have dealt with guys whose understanding of female sexuality and female bodies is very flawed. Almost all of them think that vaginal sex or anal sex are the only kinds of sex worth having, and that there's something wrong with either the girl or his penis if this doesn't cause her to have a screaming orgasm. Most of the guys in question are genuinely surprised and a bit contrite when their frustrated female partners explain that our bodies don't work that way.

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I'm a straight girl and I've crossed paths with porn a couple of times. I've watched it occasionally but don't really feel like it's shaped my sexuality at all. However, I've had plenty of conversations and experiences - some odd, some hilarious, some just sad - that came about because of porn.

Pretty much all of them have been with friends my own age I'm 19 and have centred around the lack of honest, ethical portrayal of female sexuality in porn. Quite a lot of my sexually active female friends have had sex with guys who got most or all of their sex ed from porn. One of them slept with a guy who attempted to go from vaginal sex to anal sex without any preparation, without any lube, and without asking or ever having talked about the possibility before.

When his partner acted shocked and upset, he seemed amazed that it was 'such a big deal' because 'they do it all the time in porn and the girls like it'. While this story is the extreme, a lot of us have dealt with guys whose understanding of female sexuality and female bodies is very flawed. Almost all of them think that vaginal sex or anal sex are the only kinds of sex worth having, and that there's something wrong with either the girl or his penis if this doesn't cause her to have a screaming orgasm.

Most of the guys in question are genuinely surprised and a bit contrite when their frustrated female partners explain that our bodies don't work that way. The other big one is the way porn portrays female bodies. There is a specific look that seems to be 'in' - tall, leggy, skinny, long hair, and no body hair at all.

Sure, porn exists which includes women who don't look that way - but most of it has been relegated to the 'fetish' category, so that the scene revolves entirely around the fact that the woman is chubby, or has natural pubic hair , or looks butch , or whatever.

There is basically zero porn that depicts normal people having normal sex while happening to possess bodies that differ from the ideal. If a fat girl is having sex on the screen, the guy is spending the entire video talking about cake and McDonalds.

If the girl has pubic hair, you can bet she also has arm hair, leg hair, armpit hair, and the entire damn scene begins and ends with the guy 'worshipping' her hair and talking about how hairy she is.

Nobody would be into that unless they had a body hair fetish - and so they watch 'normal' porn instead, and internalise the idea that pubes are something weird or gross. Which comes back to haunt us, young women who choose not to go through the pain, discomfort and expense of removing ours, when we encounter guys who think we're gross or slovenly or 'must be crazy feminists or something'. This rant is getting a little long, so I'll mention one last thing, which is the portrayal of lesbians in porn. Which requires only one word: yuck.

Several of my lesbian friends resent to an incredible degree the way their whole sexuality is portrayed as something that exists for men's entertainment, and I know a lesbian couple who keep a tally of the guys who've asked them for a threesome. At last count, twenty-three. Hey talle! Such good points. I hear a lot of people talking about how many other body types are represented, I even heard someone say that porn "democratises" the body.

But as you say, a hierarchy really can be seen. It's troublesome to have non-typical-porn-bodies i. For me, puberty started with a rather large and exclusive introduction to gay porn. And when I say start, I mean it literally; the first time I saw an image depicting gay sexual intercourse was around age , back when I really had no concept of what " sex " was, at a time when I was only just able to ejaculate. Paired with this discovery which was a Google blog btw, something I stumbled onto completely by accident , I grew up well into high school as that stereotypical "nerd," where my life consisted primarily of academics and other solo activities.

While basically conditioning myself to associate with a gay sexuality, I experienced a disconnect between the physical component of sexuality and the relationship or emotional component. When I was a freshman in high school, I ended up dating a few women mostly because I felt like I was 'suppose' to, but also because I genuinely liked them , and found myself imagining and liking the idea of having sex, or a physical relationship.

Obviously there is a lot more to this story, and if the paragraph above continued trying to express my sexuality and experiences all in one scope, it would just deteriorate into a bunch of rambling and disconnected, run-on sentences something I may do at a later time, but in a more organized manner. However, the short summation of all of it is this; I grew up through puberty and most of high school associating the discovery of sex and physical relationships with gay pornography , while at the same time being completely isolated from discussing sexuality with anyone else, or even sharing the experience of discovering sex with my peers teasing, questioning, expressing, etc.

As such, pornography has had a massive impact if not a defining one on my sexuality and sexual preferences. In the absence of being exposed to porn, especially so young and so exclusively gay, I feel that my sexuality could, and would be, very different. Hey anon I'm one of the 'male' volunteers active at the moment! We are here! To clarify, a majority of the questions we get are from young women, this dictates for a large part what content we create, as much of it is answering the questions that people ask.

I think a lot of that is to do with how many societies put the burden of sexual health on women you'll notice sexual health interchanged with women's health SO much , and also dealing with pregnancy is so very often a concern for those with uteri.

I would be weary, also, of misreading our gender neutral articles as directed to women you may not personally do this, but it happens , it's really easy to make that mistake However it's always important to do better. If you'd like to suggest any particular topics you'd like covered do come ask the questions. Also, back on topic, your experiences with porn sound really interesting! Thank you for sharing It sounds like you're doing really well to work out your sexuality under some quite difficult circumstances.

Best of luck. I started watching porn when I was in elementary school and by the sixth grade began masturbating. I am pretty sensitive and emotional so I take certain involvement with people very seriously, my intimate involvement is at the Tippy top of the list. I have yet to find anyone who I'm actually comfortable having sex with though I have thought about sex with different people.

My friends half jokingly and half seriously express their concern for whoever my first sexual partner will be based on my openness to talking about sex and my mental willingness to experiment with different sexual acts. I think this is because I have been watching porn for so long, I know it is okay to try different things with a partner you are comfortable with. I've also seen and gained an interest in different sexual acts. I first saw porn when I was in 3rd grade, my bro exposed me to it before this shock I had come to the conclusion that women also have penises because I was too stubborn as a child and liked to find things out myself apparently.

I was also pretty shy so I had plenty of crushes on girls but I imagined sex to be something different. So, after that run-in with my brother my mom tried to give me "the talk" properly. Of course I was shy and didn't want to talk. Which I should have So I ended up, when I finally got a "private" computer of my own, looking up things and finding transsexual things. I liked them but this lead me to be confused about my sexuality. So now I am out of high school almost independent and I think I am bi dominant hetero not sure because I am still discovering what I like more what I don't like.

I am still coming to terms with the fact that I had a few crushes on the same sex but, shrugged them off as embarrassing moments at the time. I am still not sure about my sexuality to this day. I probably would have started trying to discover myself faster if not for other events which is unrelated Personally, I believe a way you were raised or a way you see something as a child can definitely affect the way you grow up thinking and feeling. Have you heard the song "Same Love" by Mackelmore? In the beginning he states how in the third grade he thought he was gay due to a preconceived view.

For example, if a guy likes to decorate, he's gay, or if a woman has boy cut hair, she's a lesbian. See what I'm saying? What you thought as a child is still bothering you to this day. It is very possible that you are bi- sexual , and if you are that is just fine. But it is also extremely likely that your mind is not allowing you to get rid of these thoughts and feelings that you had because it's tying to tell you that you are something that you are not. Been there and done that.

I struggled with that for years. My example, was I thought girls were really pretty, and I knew lesbians were attracted to other women, so I thought that that was what I was. I was confused and didn't know how to compartmentalize my thoughts and separate reality from misunderstanding. But with age and experience and situations, i've come to realize who I am. That will come to you in time, too. Best luck and wishes and prayers to you. I'm an interesting case because I am a demisexual. Even though I am 21, I have never had sex due to the fact I have never found someone I have truly loved or felt comfortable enough with to engage in sex.

However, I still get horny quite often, and porn along with masturbation has been an outlet for me since 8th grade. So while I watch porn quite often and preferring male gay porn, which I find quite intimate , I don't think it has affected me at all, because I still haven't even had sex yet. I am exactly the same! I am 20 years old and have never felt attracted to someone enough to be able to comprehend having sex!

It took me years to finally accept that I am who I am, and I'll be ready to have sex when I find the right person! So, I'm bi. I am very aroused by females and makes, not at all. But as far as sex goes, I want a guy. I'm a virgin and when I watch hentai and masturbate, I like females, usually being toyed by men.

I'm screwed up as far as my taste in porn goes. It's really weird, cos I think I'm turned on by females but i wouldn't want to have sex with a girl I'm confused!

I think that's pretty normal, at least from my perspective. But in 'real life', I definitely am straight. Either way, I wouldn't worry about it to much! Act as you normally would and just pursue what you enjoy most, even if that differs from setting to setting. I'm a female and I get off by watching lesbians having sex.



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